Once upon a time I was playing Sonic 3 when a knock was on my door. It was some fanboy dressed up as Silver from Sonic's 15th birthday surprise.

"Your game, sir."

I can't believe it! I got the fresh and hip Sonic game. But the disc strangely didn't have any cover on it, and the words "SONIC.PLAY" was written on in HYPER REALISTIC BLOOD. I put the game into the XBOX and I was filled with determination as the iconic SEGA logo filled the screen. Then I saw a screen. It looked like a worn down arcade. One of the screens said "CHOOSE GAME" in dark red 8 bit letters. I chose one. Now, I'll get to the first in a second.

The first game was entitled "Sonic's Inside Job" in a dark fleshy cave filled with green liquid. I'm guessing that's a stomach. First there was a cutscene. It showed Tails and Knuckles force feeding Sonic chili dogs. All of a sudden, Sonic swallowed them for no reason. I couldn't describe how he ate them, but his jaws unhinged like a snake and a second pair of teeth reached out of his head and dragged the two in. The game is a 3D platformer which has pretty tight controls, but one thing caught me off guard. When searching for Sonic's memories in the brain level, some of the little snippets from Sonic's life seemed a tad off. All of them were first person, which made it more jarring. One memory was Sonic going near a weird statue of a triangular creature with a hand sticking out. When Sonic touched the stone statue, everything flashed red and became distorted. A slowed down and reversed recording of All Star by Smash Mouth was the music. Text appeared in the mess, saying "GET CRUNK" while violently flashing and glitching.

The next game was "Sonic gets Spooked". It begins with Sonic going into a mansion, but a rotting skeleton locks him up inside. The game is Sonic going from room to room solving puzzles and finding secrets. But at the end, Sonic falls into a vat of acid, and crawls out as the skeleton seen earlier. It then cuts to a view outside, where ANOTHER Sonic is in the mansion's yard. Cut back to the mansion, and there's Sonics everywhere. Most of them are deformed husks, but some actually are OK... until they get dropped into the acid.

The last game was "Sonic Exploration". It stars Sonic meeting up with Knuckles who found a weird diamond. The diamond transforms into 8 separate pieces that fly off. Sonic goes looking for them. The game is OK, and the controls are decent. But at World 6, HYPER REALISTIC BLOOD starts appearing everywhere and makes things a nuisance. There isn't really a sensible ending. When Sonic connects all 8 pieces together, the cutscene stops and the triangular creature appeared with red text saying, "THAT WAS FUN. LET'S FINISH THE JOB."

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